Full Range of Motion

In yoga there is this concept of full range of motion. It is why we push ourselves to be able to reach certain poses and lean in a little bit further. Many people never get to their full range of bodily motion because it takes years of dedicated practice, and the willingness to be constantly be leaning into your physical pain. Not to mention attending trainings and buying the equipment needed can be costly—ouch! However, with dedication, consistency, willingness to learn, and maybe spend a little, people can get close—if not completely—reach their full range of motion. Little by little, if you stick with your daily practice, you will begin to notice more ease in your daily movements. This is a place I have gotten to with yoga before; however, many barriers came up along the way, and eventually I lost the dedication and inspiration. Needless to say, I am back to having back pain and general discomfort as I move about.

But we are more than just a body. In yoga, the focus on bodily postures (asana) is only one of the eight “limbs” of yoga. In the Western world, we tend to focus on this aspect of ourselves more than the others. Most yoga classes are mainly concerned with increasing physical flexibility and strength; however, to ignore the other aspects of what it means to be human would not be reaching our true range of motion. I

In addition to the body, we have a heart. The heart is the home to our emotions. By increasing the range of motion in our hearts, we are able to love fully and be loved. We are able to regulate our emotions and cope well with the stressors of life. We can empathize and relate to people, but also recognize when we are perhaps giving too much. Having a full range of motion in the heart also includes recognizing when it is time to take care of ourselves.

Often seen in contrast to the heart is the mind. Too much rigidity in the mind leads to black and white thinking. Too much flexibility can cause us to be flighty or non-committed. Having full range of motion in the mind is often referred to in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy as “wise mind”. In wise mind, we can take into account our emotions; we observe them without judgement; however, our wise mind does not necessarily permit us to impulsively act on our emotions. The wise mind observes and validates emotions, and only then—out of a validated state of mind—chooses the best course of action based on all of the information given.

Finally, having full range of motion in the spirit is often overlooked in therapy circles. Many believe that the spirit refers to religion, but this is not necessarily true. Ideally, a religious place of worship is where we get spiritually fed; however, this is often not the case unfortunately. Thankfully, there are ways to gain spiritual range of motion without the institution of religion. Often times I get the question, “What is a spirit, and what does it have to do with therapy?” When I discuss the spirit in my sessions, I am referring to a sense of purpose in your life, or a sense of inspiration, meaning, and calling to something greater than yourself. Often my clients with a lack of motivation towards career goals recognize that they have been neglecting their spirit, or their sense of a higher purpose. Balancing the spirit is also essential in trauma recovery work. Unfortunately, I see a lot of individuals who have been hurt (or even abused) by the church in a number of ways, and this causes them to lose a sense of hope and purpose in recovering from their trauma. Traumatized individuals often have questions such as, “Why did I have to suffer so pointlessly? What was that all for?” Addressing spiritual range of motion can help individuals come to conclusions of these questions and find peace and healing through the grief process.

Addressing the full range of motion through therapeutic intervention is often referred to in therapy circles as “treating the whole person”. You are not just a body; you are not just a mind, heart, or spirit. I enjoy helping individuals reach their full potential, and one of the ways I do that is through discussing the enneagram and your individual enneagram type. The enneagram has been used for decades to help people self-actualize, and it predates modern psychiatric diagnosis by centuries. To discuss the issues outlined in this post and more, contact Julia@northsidementalhealth.com to book an appointment.

Silence

I work with many individuals who have social anxiety. Having had it myself, I might know a thing or two about what it can be like. One of the most surprising things that I hear from individuals with social anxiety is that they fear silence-or lulls-in conversation. I was reflecting about why this might be, as I frequently try to avoid silence myself. Typically I will chatter away, find something else to do, listen to music, fiddle with something, or anything to avoid the dreaded silence that is inevitable when two (or more) people run out of something to talk about.

One theory that I have come up with is that silence is somewhat intimate. How often do we stop and look at one another in the face without words? How often do we really pause to see the other person without feeling the need to fill the space with noise? For me and for many others, this is only with people whom we are most comfortable. Words between people often only serve to fulfill the needs of the ego. Once we know we are accepted fully, only then can we be silent with one another.

Silence is not only reserved for the confines of our most intimate connections, but silence is also a privilege. Where we find acceptance, we find silence, calm, and rest.

Therapy

Being a therapist is hard. It calls on you to use everything you have- mentally, spiritually, emotionally. Sometimes we do work harder than our clients. It also causes us to have a strange relationship with intimacy. We are used to getting to the nitty gritty in our professional life, whereas our personal interactions can more often than not take on a surface-y tone. We preach how to heal, and sometimes we aren’t the best at taking our own advice. We struggle alongside our clients at times, but we can never let them know; whereas in a personal relationship it’s normal to admit to loved ones where we struggle. We want to have this intimacy in our personal life, but when we go to reach for it from our back pocket, we suddenly find that it has disappeared. We are used to being right and being looked to for advice; yet in our personal lives our loved ones may grimace at or even detest our words of wisdom. It can be easy to forget that personal relationships don’t function on being right, on having the proper knowledge. It’s more about making the connection, struggling together-being cluelessly lost in this thing called life but trusting the other person to carry you through. Being a therapist can also be like reliving your own deepest pain, over and over. The clients who are drawn to your work may embody some of the qualities of your abusers, and you had better be ready to have compassion. In our personal lives we are rarely this ready to show compassion-we don’t need to be. We have-hopefully-safeguarded our lives from that kind of abuse. Some of us have not, and that’s a hard road.

Being a therapist also has many many rewards. We get to see people grow. We challenge our old habits again and again to become better people and better therapists. The challenge to grow personally is constant. We can feel proud of our clients and simultaneously proud of what we too have overcome. We are reminded that yes, we really did make (some of) the right choices in life. We become very tolerant and perhaps even embrace life’s imperfections and disappointments. We get to know our people deeply, and we love them. We see ourselves in them, and offer compassion and understanding, while also learning to extend the same unconditional love to ourselves. It can make us better communicators, partners, parents, siblings, cousins, and leaders. It demands everything, but has the potential to give you everything you need in return.

About Me:

Hello everyone! My name is Julia Moore. I am a mental health counselor in Indianapolis. My ideal client population is helping those who want to better their relationships. This could mean a newly single dude, gal, or non-binary person. This could also mean someone who has been through several traumatic relationships who wants to figure out, “Why do they always end up being the same??” Perhaps you are part of a couple, and you have lost that spark, and you’d like to get it back. Maybe your sex life is not what you’d hoped it would be. All of these issues and more, I am here to help you with. I developed this passion through my early dating woes; through the craziness of it all–I learned there can be a better way. I eventually found *cough* worked my ass off to get to this point*cough*…my husband. We are happily married with two dog children: a pomeranian and a pomsky (husky mixed with a pomeranian). I, too have battled depression and anxiety and have come out on the other side. In short, I believe in what I am preaching. My hope for this blog/website/THING is that it brings you inspiration, laughter, and hope. Welcome to Moore Vulnerability Counseling.

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton